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Why Manly Men Make Great Husbands


Husbands…I’d like to talk to you for a moment.

How do you see yourself? Are you loving, genuine, trustworthy, optimistic, strong, compassionate, calm…

or do you see yourself untrustworthy, unloving, disingenuous, never measuring up, empathic and disconnected?

Now how do you see your wife?

Did you know that how you see yourself, and how you treat yourself, is also how you treat your wife?

At first read that probably doesn’t make much sense, but let me explain why this is the case and why this is vitally important to understand.


We have two brains. That’s right!  Researchers published a study in the Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine that indicates our hearts can “feel” the future before it happens. And even though the brain and body as a whole are involved in processing, it appears that the heart gets there first.  This would make sense, particularly when something happens that hurts us deeply and yet our brain cannot always process what just happened fast enough.

It also makes sense that they would consider the heart our first brain when you realize that our bodies can still live, even if our brains are not functioning.

Although our feelings originate from the heart, it is our second brain that chooses whether or not to bare all the things.  

“But you don’t know what I have to put up with!”

Most people would stop reading right here and give a million excuses as to why they cannot “bare all things” and I do understand. Its true that I don’t know what all you might have to put up with, but I KNOW that you can choose to love through every flaw, through every set of floppy flannel pajamas, through depression, chemo treatments, the death of a child, loss of a job, no more money…  

… remembering that love will always be a choice from both the head and the heart.  I never said it would be easy, I only believe anything is possible.

Manly Men Pray

On Sunday I read two unrelated facebook posts from two wives who complimented their husbands.  One called her husband “a real man” and the other a “manly man” all because they regularly prayed out loud together.  During prayer time their husbands would reveal dreams, concerns, their desire for a strong marriage, hope for their children and for the future.

There isn’t a woman alive who wouldn’t want to be connected or committed to someone who is willing to be vulnerable.

Screen Shot 2014-07-28 at 10.12.20 AMWhat if;

     * you set your own moral compass to pray out loud or to talk about these things with your wife on a regular basis? 

Would it be easier;

     * to stay in alignment with your personal true North because as you speak it out loud someone can affirm and agree with you?

Would it;

     * make you stronger to take a stand for your bride and for your future family in a way that is unshakeable?

To set your moral compass to God’s definition of love means there would be no reason to ever ‘fight’ for your marriage.  Your daily life would create a home of peace, of safety and of love.

Imagine how much easier it would be if your wife got off course, and you were able to draw her back with the words of love God gives you instead of relying on the only examples you had while growing up.

YOU are the one who will lead your family toward comfort regardless of external circumstances.

YOU are the one human being who can help them feel safe again.

Most men need a little help learning to love like this because it doesn’t come natural to most.  Its a learned behavior and let me just say that if someone with a traumatic brain injury can learn to re-live again, you can learn to re-live again.

By clicking on the “Contact” tab in the lower right corner of this page you can connect with me so we can get you started on the journey of being genuinely happy TODAY.  We need more Godly men to take a stand for their wives, and for themselves, to create stronger marriages and families. 

Starting with you – we CAN get America back on track.

Please share this post if you feel it was valuable and I’d love to hear your comments below.

Put Love First,



Founder at Connecting LLC
After persevering through a traumatic brain injury and death of family members in 2007, Kellie Frazier was blessed with a miracle. As she pressed into God's vision for her life, she went on to publish several books while helping others publish their books. She finds great fulfillment in living a loving CHRIST-ian lifestyle. A devoted wife and mother for more than 34 years, she loves God, and others as she loves herself.

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